Friends, this may be the direst investigation I have undertaken. There are fundamental warning signs in Charlie and Lola, that could lead to the end of the world as we know it. Call it what you will, Armageddon, The Apocalypse, End Times, Eschaton, Zombie Uprising, the Millennium Bug finally coming to fruition, or whatever. Charlie and Lola have got a big neon sign and they’re directing our destinies down their own particular avenue of potential futures, and it will not end well for us if we just let it happen!
I know Charlie and Lola look all ‘childhood wonder’, imagination, and pink milk (I’ll come back to that later), and I know that they have a seemingly productive and friendly relationship, but let’s focus on another relationship; one less obvious and far more sinister. The key to unlocking the dread fate Charlie and Lola are leading us towards lies in the singular character of Soren Lorensen, Lola’s imaginary friend.
Let’s start with the biggest giveaway. Soren Lorensen is a ghost. He’s grey, transparent, and seems to be able to fade into the background at will, whenever someone other than Lola (his vassal) is around. So Lola has a ghost that speaks to her, and by comparing likenesses, we can see that Soren Lorensen is certainly a member of Charlie and Lola’s family. Charlie and Lola’s surname is Sonner, which is of German origin, and Lorensen is Nordic, so we can trace the path of Charlie and Lola’s family history from the UK, through Germany, to Scandinavia. This is also backed up by their blonde hair!
Now, friends, we have a Nordic ancestral ghost trying to influence a 5 year old girl. Through my extensive research into Norse mythology, Viking ghosts only arise if their burial sites have been desecrated in some way. This desecration can usually be rectified to release the ghost, but what if the burial site is beyond recovery? Maybe a new Swedish branch of Ikea put their foundations through it, maybe an Icelandic banker buried their ill gotten gains in it, and sealed it with concrete, who knows. The point is that Soren Lorensen will not be able to rest until his burial site is restored or (and this is the important part) Ragnarök has begun!
At Ragnarök, the great final battle between the Norse Gods and the Frost Giants, the Viking warriors who died valiantly in battle will be raised up to fight alongside Odin and Thor etc. against the Frost Giants. In this battle both sides will be defeated, and the world will sink beneath the waves, all but removing humanity from existence! Ragnarök will begin when the great wolf Fenrir breaks the chains that bind him, and this is what Soren Lorensen is seeking to bring about. In his selfish desire to be at peace he will destroy the very world, and he’s using Lola to do it! All of their trips using their imagination, may just be a ruse. Soren Lorensen is using the power of a little girl’s imagination. The trips they take are more vivid than we may realise, and actually show Soren Lorensen piggy backing on Lola’s astral form, as they project themselves around the world, searching for the location of Fenrir!
How is this astral projection accomplished? We have only to look towards Lola’s favourite drink, pink milk. It’s never called strawberry milk, or a milk shake, and the reason is because it does not taste of strawberries, or raspberries or any berries, but something far more sinister and other worldly. The reason the milk is pink is not through any friendly artificial flavourings or colourings, it involves slain enemies, and a simple question. What two colours do you mix to make pink? Once they have found Fenrir, Soren Lorensen will begin the process of trying to free him. This is why Lola is so obsessed with dogs. Soren Lorensen has been conditioning her over the years to see the canine form as a great ally, and something to be played with, so that when Fenrir has been located Lola will not shy away from helping the great wolf!
Friends, the consequences of Soren Lorensen succeeding in his quest for oblivion are indeed dire, and there were times when I would write this folly off as absurd, but during my investigation I stumbled upon an image that may indeed point towards the location of Fenrir, in an isolated mountain range in China, specifically Mount Gongga.
This photograph captured all too familiar shadows on the mountain that might spell the doom for us all. Let us hope that Soren Lorensen continues to confine his search to Northern Europe. The time of Ragnarök may be approaching. The signs are there. My frost free freezer is constantly producing frost at an alarming rate! Keep your heating turned high, friends. It may be the best defence against encroaching Frost Giants!